joanne: in my own words

Let me sing a song for you,
Please sit and listen to the tune,
This ain't no song of greatness,
But only a voice of a girl,
Singing about her world.

So let me sing a song for you,
Please please please, do listen to the tune,
All I wish is for you to hear me,
As I sing about my days,
Now sing with me if you may.

Monday, February 6, 2012

Please Come Home...

I looked up. Dark clouds were moving rapidly above, assembling to create a heavy mass that will soon burst into showers of rain.

I waited. And waited. But only silence prevailed.

It took me awhile to realize that you were not with me. I was alone, lost in my own reverie. My eyes touched a scenery that was once all too familiar - a scenery that was set in a place where we had both called Home.

Home was the exact spot where we had both first laid eyes on each other; a thunderbolt of lightning that struck right through our hearts and bound us together forever - or was it?

We fell deeply in love, so engrossed in ourselves that we were lost to the world. Nothing else did matter as long as I was by your side and you were by mine.

Our life was beautiful; so beautiful beyond description. On this very place where we called Home, you pronounced your vows to me and I to you; and we were sealed for a destiny together. In all those years, we weaved many memories together: the forget-me-not kisses, the shampoo sessions in the rain, the intimate talks on the balcony, the sensual love-making in the dark. I was happy and so were you. In our happiness, we forgot about the real world. We forgot about how corrupted the real world was and the poison it brought with it.

Why do I miss you even when you are just standing next to me? Why do I feel like more than a distance between us? I have climbed every mountain and swam every river just to bring us Home. But lately, I am afraid - so afraid that we are running out of time. I am afraid that we can't rewind and return to where we had left off. I, myself, am losing faith. I just can't do it alone.

Tell me what to do. Just don't tell me that it's over... Or is it really?

For if your heart's not in it anymore, please stop faking what you don't feel. If this love is already gone, I don't want you to keep me hanging on. What is worse than knowing that you are pretending to try to save us when the truth is that you don't love me anymore? Just say the words and I will let you go. What is the point of chaining you when your heart already belongs to someone else? The world is not as innocent as I had assumed it to be. It is actually more treacherous and corrupted than I had imagined. I thought that our love was too pure and too strong for anything in this world to destroy. But I was wrong, indeed. It has come to take away one of us. And the other one is now left to walk the remaining journey alone.

But I had returned Home now, after all these years as an old lady. With a walking stick in my hand to assist in my feeble movements, I may be old physically but my memories were still very much alive. And so were my emotions. I had loved you then and I still love you now. Though this weak old lady may not know where you are exactly, but to this very day, I still pine for you. I miss you... very much. I intend to spend the last of my days waiting for you here as that is all I know I have lived for. With what's left of me, I will wait for the day when you safely return Home.