joanne: in my own words

Let me sing a song for you,
Please sit and listen to the tune,
This ain't no song of greatness,
But only a voice of a girl,
Singing about her world.

So let me sing a song for you,
Please please please, do listen to the tune,
All I wish is for you to hear me,
As I sing about my days,
Now sing with me if you may.

Thursday, June 18, 2009


The day seemed to be so still. No wind, no leaves rustling, no birds chirping. Nothing. Even the Sun was shining half-heartedly. There was something different in the air. Perhaps, it was the weather. Or maybe, it was the people.

But no. It's not the weather, and neither the people. It was something that was going on in that house. Men dressed in black suits and women who covered their faces in black veils were going in and coming out of the house. A lady was standing at the door acknowledging every person that passed her by. It seemed like she was the owner of the house. Also dressed in black and her face covered in a black net veil, the lady wore the most solemn face in the world. That "something" which was going on in that house smelled like "death". Oh right, now everything made sense. Someone dear had just passed away in that house. And it happened to be the lady's husband.

They were newly-weds. They had been dating since back in sophomore year. A year ago, they decided to spend the rest of their lives with each other by tying the knot. Their wedding was the sweetest and most wonderful wedding a couple could ever dream of. It was such a lovely sight to see two people, a man and a lady, who were so deeply in love with each other, happily married.

Call it Fate. Call it Destiny. Yesterday morning, as he was leaving the house for work, he kissed her goodbye at the door. Little did she know that that kiss would be the last kiss he would ever give her. An hour after that, she received a call from the police that her husband had just met with a terrible accident in town. He was in critical condition and fighting for his life. She rushed to the hospital to be with him. There on the hospital bed, he looked so messed up, so weak, so fragile. When she saw him, tears were welling up her eyes. She fought back the tears because she knew that he didn't like to see her cry. It would only make the situation worse. He always hated to see her sad because nothing would make him sadder to see her sad face. She felt his pain. She felt that she was losing him. And so, she held his hand, squeezing it tightly. He blinked a little to acknowledge her presence. She was shaking in fear, preparing for the worst. He signaled for her to come closer to his face. She bent forward towards him. Feebly, he whispered into her ear "Honey, I love you." She nodded and professed, "Darling, I love you too. Please don't leave me... Please!" Even in his pain, he managed to smile at her, trying to tell her that everything'd be all right... very soon.

As the guests left, one by one, she was beginning to feel the silence. Not to mention, the coldness and the emptiness. She was now alone. For hours, she sat at the edge of the bed, wondering what was left in her life. The house had too many memories of which they both shared. Each was flashing before her eyes. Tired. But so much to reminisce. The kitchen where they had cooked together as man and wife, the dining table where they had sat eating together, the couch where they had slept on, wrapped in each other's arms on a cold winter night, and the same bed she was sitting on right now where they had made passionate love. None of these would ever happen again. All that was left now were just as they were - memories...

Seconds. Minutes. Hours and days had passed. She still felt the emptiness. His absence. She missed him dearly and sometimes found herself crying in the middle of the night, soaking up the pillows. The walls were her only audience. And in one of such nights, she woke up with a funny feeling in her stomach. Instead of spending the remaining night in tears, she was vomitting in the bathroom. And as she was beginning to think that her life was meaningless and that it was just a matter of time, she had discovered a new hope. Or perhaps, he has not left after all. He had given her something to believe in and to hope for. He had given her life. Joy began filling her every corner. She felt warm again. She felt life. He was growing in her. And she knew with all her heart that this was it. The loneliness and the emptiness before this were temporary. She had something to live for now. His legacy. His son.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Miss You Serenade

it's eight...and ticking.

what am i waiting for?
i don't know.

i used to have lots of things to count down to.
new year's day. birthdays. anniversaries.
and of course, meeting you again.
we used to have dates for everything together.
you and me.
but now, we don't even know what we have,
let alone, dates to look forward to.

we are one and yet, we are not.
i feel you so strongly inside of me,
filling me up every corner and nook,
but still, it's empty.

my heart is empty,
my heart is decaying,
it's hungry and it's thirsty,
wanting to be satisfied.
i don't know much,
but just this one truth,
i know that i miss you.

every day,
when the sun shines its last ray,
i wait for you.
i wanna feel your arms around me,
hold me like you always do.
as you tuck me into bed at night and turn off the light,
i wanna feel your warmth enveloping me,
telling me that i would be safe tonight.
i like the way you play my hair,
i love the way you whisper tenderly into my ear.
i just wanna feel you,
won't you please, come back here,
because tomorrow morning,
i know that you'd be gone,
when i open my eyes,
knowing no one's beside.

if i am left with one wish in this world,
i want it to be you.
i want you to be the first thing i wake up to in the morning,
and the last, when night falls.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

2 Strangers

it was a rainy afternoon.
unforeseen or destined,
the meeting of 2 strangers under an old wooden shed.
little did they know,
this meeting was much more than that,
much more than just a man and a lady,
seeking shelter from the cries of the heavens.

both were drenched.
droplets of water gathering in a pool beneath their feet.
instead of Coldness, it was Awkwardness that filled the air.
each occupying a side of the shed,
standing and thinking: what could possibly be more odd than this?

he stole a look at her.
she was undeniably beautiful.
she responded with a look from the corner of her eyes.
he was irresistibly handsome.

oddity was something both were not prepared to face.
let alone, trapped by the rain in this meeting,
unforeseen or destined, at this place.
is this pure coincidence or is this arranged by Him?
but whatever it is, this could be more than it seems.

whatever happened then, under that old wooden shed,
on that rainy afternoon, let us not know.
the end of the story should be left untold.
i do not want to write about how it should end,
of whether they ended up together or stayed as friends,
though i'd very much like to see 2 people,
sharing their lives together,
and being madly in love with one another.

Wake Me Up


and wanting to wake up.

i am just waiting for the right time to rise;
waiting for that something to shake me from my slumber;
perhaps waiting for a person, not a thing;
and waiting for that right moment to dawn.

it feels like a thousand years of silence,
still and cold and sometimes colder.
it feels like i am walking aimlessly in a dream so long,
so vivid and so real, it scares me to my core.

my eyes are tired;
tired of being shut out from the light.
my limbs are numb,
for they have not moved a muscle since forever.
my lips are dry;
waiting for the key to my awakening,
like the princess in sleeping beauty to hers.

so won't you come and revive me?
give me that key and breathe air into my nostrils.
give me that warmth of life i've been waiting for.
open my eyes and bring light into me.

save me, please, won't you?
whoever you are, save me now, i beg you.
free me please from this prison of sleep,
let me rise from the deep,
free me please from this pain,
i could never be the same again.

wake me, wake me, wake me...